October hasn't been easy in any aspects, I struggled a lot with family and health issues, but even with that I managed to power through them for the most part, it comes a time where no matter how much you try or how much you push yourself to accomplish that goal, your mind is too tired to keep going so it asks for a rest, for a time off of everything. 

My mind is overly tired, I feel over emotional and even when I know I can keep going, I don't know what to do next or how to start that next chapter.

This month has helped me realise that you can't control everything, I pulled two muscles in the span of three weeks, hurt my neck (once again), hurt my knee and hands while working out and went to the ophthalmologist just to be told that I have conjunctivitis and it's going to take a while for my eyes to go back to normal. 

Then there's my family, there's no much I would want to share right now, mostly out of respect to everyone that's involved, because it isn't only rough for me but for everyone around her. Unfortunately every day I realise more and more that even when you wish you could control it, you can't, you just have to make it better for her while you can. 

But even with all of this I've been lucky this month, I had a really good birthday with my family and a few friends (the family is getting smaller but that's something I don't want to get too much into right now, it's happened before and this time I don't want to run behind anyone, I have the ones I love right besides me), I got to do what I love the most, eat and watch youtube videos, plus I went on an amazing trip with my family.

It has had it's up's & down's but I feel like my life is starting to take shape little by little, I need to learn to balance my personal, work and family life with everything else, I also need to learn to be patience and not take anything up to personal, let the world keep spinning and just do what I'm supposed to do, take care of myself and enjoy life because you only get one. 

Mayte.