Ever since that day I've been thinking a lot, maybe I'm wrong about my attitude after what happened, maybe I shouldn't have said anything, maybe everyone else is right and things like this should be kept from the world.
The more I think about it, the less it makes sense. I know people aren't trained to talk about mental health and most of them don't know how to react when someone tells them what they've been going through, but sometimes saying that you are right there for them is more than enough and will do more good than giving advice, and more if it's "obvious" advice.
This is one of the reasons of why mental health is still a taboo subject, because the few people that are open to talk about it get judged for it or are giving "life advice" by people that think is all about being happy, feeling better  or eating healthier.
Whenever I try to explain what I deal with, I get mixed reactions, some recommending natural remedies, some telling me to not make such a big deal of everything around me and others being emphatic, giving me their support and making me feel like I'm not crazy, because more people than you think are going through this.
Sometimes it feels like I can't even talk about how having anxiety affects my sleep, my eating behaviours or merely the way I manage myself. It's more than getting nervous over something, it's more than losing a few hours of sleep and it's certainly more than just being afraid of someone getting close to you on public transport.
Yes, sometimes my anxiety lets me do most of my daily activities. Those are the good days, when I wake up and feel like I'm ready for what the world has in store for me. It feels like I can be a normal human being and not worry about controlling the little things. Most of my days are like this.
Then there are bad days, some start from the moment I wake up, some start after my morning coffee and others are triggered by something that happens, it doesn't have to be a big event, sometimes the tinniest things are the ones that send me on a downward spiral. Those are the days I want the world to stop for a little bit just so I can take a nap and maybe feel better after that.
That's why it's so hard for me to explain how it affects my daily life and how I manage it. Every time I feel like I have it figured it out, something changes and my whole system is thrown off. It's a constant battle but one that I'm not afraid to fight anymore because the good days make it all worthy.
If you know someone that is going through something similar, don't give unsolicited advice, ask them if they need anything and remind them that what they are doing is amazing, going through this makes them stronger than anyone can imagine.