Inspiration comes to me in the weirdest ways, this time was while I was walking back home after deciding how miserable I was on French, how much I didn't wanted to go to that class and finally quitting, when this one song started "Can't Hold Us" by Macklemore.
It always gets me going and helps me with those low days, but this time I picked a line "We came here to live life like nobody was watching" and I found myself repeating that song until I got home and really listening to that phrase, because so often we hear gossip or people judging on our actions that we just stop doing what we love.
All of this fitted with a lot of this that are going not only through my life but also my friends life, I can't say names because I know they would kill me, but you can pin-point and try to guess who I'm talking about.
All of this started when I began to call "The Editor" a lot more, we usually communicate through messages, but as we have really different schedules, sometimes it's hard to talk and as most of you know, I'm working on a project with him, so for me, it's really important to share somethings and he's really opinionated, a thing that I really like, back to the point, some of my classmates started giving me this bad looks because of the way I talked to him.
As a background, I talk to some of my guy friends with a not so friendly vocabulary, but it's all part of the joke, I mostly call them idiots when they need the little reminder, or sometimes I tend to baby them, I'm all cute with them, because they are like brothers to me.
And all of this complicated when I started hanging more and more with guys, which lead to really nasty comments about me liking them even when I didn't, comments about me sharing a cigarette (which I do occasionally, maybe once a month or week,depends on my mood) and that really was putting me off and making me think twice every movement I made and to be honest, I've never done this, not even in high school.
That's when my bitchy side started to come out, because I like to challenge people, but it wasn't until I talked with one of those boys I hang out with that I became aware of the power I was giving them and how stupid the situation was, I was letting them manipulate me into thinking that all of that was wrong, when in reality, the ones that were wrong were them for judging me.
As for my friends, they've been going through a lot of changes and even though I support them and now I laugh, at the moment, I was shocked, half of them were like my old brothers or sisters and now they are having wild college nights, maybe not as wild but they are enjoying more and going with the groove, which I really like because they are going to get to experience a lot, it's just that they are growing in front of me and I kinda want to protect them from the nasty experiences I've had, but I also know they have to learn at some point.
Where I'm going with this, is that people are going to judge you most of the time, no matter what you do or how you do it, but it's up to you whether you want to listen to them and lead the life they think is right or doing you thing, for some you'll be a crazy person, but you'll be happier, not everyone is going to agree with you either, so we just have to let everyone lead the life they want as long as they don't hurt others.