I took a break, not because I needed or anything like that, but I genuinely didn't had time, starting a new job is always hard, you don't know what's going on, you can' control anything, but nonetheless, I love every part of it.
Anyway, we're back in business and just like anytime I take a break, the ideas flow and I come back with better and renovated projects in my mind, this time is no exception, I'm now more into photography and I feel more pumped to do things that maybe in the past didn't crossed my mind or if they did, I never considered them possible.
I went MIA for a week not only from this blog, but social media and even my friends were affected by this, it wasn't like I didn't want them to know about me, it was more of my problem, I (would) wake up early, shower, go to work and expect the day to be calm and nice, something that hasn't happened as much as you would think, then I would come back and rest, the idea of talking with something didn't even crossed my mind.
Over this past two weeks I've been focusing my energy and time into thinking what I want to do next in my life, I'm realising that I'm not a fifteen year old that can wait around for opportunities to pop up, I have to go out and find them, just like with pokemon.
This, in part, has to do with the environment I've been working on lately, my boss is an amazing woman that serves as an example that you don't need men in order to be successful, you can do you, go your way and accomplish as much as you want, showing others what you are capable of.
This week was an actual roller coaster, it started great and amazing, but by wednesday I was starting to have ths mood swings and I wasn't even happy with the way I looked, I was insecure, sad, angry and not myself, so as I've doing, I take a step back and re-think the situation, one thing I'm learning from my boss is that if a problem has a solution, why worry, if it doesn't, why worry, the only thing you are going to do is make it worst and as she says: "it's bad for you, it eats you inside out", just like with guilt, nothing good comes from that.
I've been really good about my healthy eating lately, but this week was really hard, all of the sudden there were people delivering candy to the office and as we started the "Secret Friend" dynamic where you have to give something small every day to the person you were given,that person knows I love chocolate way too much to leave it on the side, but as I started going hard on my workouts, I feel more motivated to be healthy.
Another thing I noticed through this two weeks is that I've been paying more attention to the way I look and I'm actually really curious to know if it has something to do with the fact that I think I'm fancying someone or if it's about the job, I guess I just have to wait and figure it out on my own.
I'm coming back stronger than ever, I feel motivated, a bit more confident, a bit more adventurous but most importantly, more like myself, hope you like the few changes that are going to be happening here, have a great week, wish me success and keep on dreaming.

I love very single one of the pictures I took on that trip, unfortunately, most of them have my cousins or my family and I can't upload them, but with the ones I can, I'm more than happy. Hope you liked them.

Will this fight matter in 4 months time? Is it really worthy to spend time and energy fighting over this? This are the questions that someone asked me when I told him that I've been fighting with my dad over little things lately.
Sometimes we get caught on the heat of the moment and say things we don't really believe, we say them because we want to win, we want to almost hurt the other person to show that we are better, that we are right, that the other person has been living in a mistake until now.
Or sometimes we are the one that's getting hurt by what others tell us, we get so sensible that we let everything get us, we believe that everything that person is saying is real, when in reality, it's all part of the anger of the moment.
I'm a very sensitive person, you know when something is bothering me by looking at my face, I wear my heart on my sleeve and in times of anger I tend to cry, because I get so overwhelmed that I can either cry or stay and say things I don't believe.
The reality is that as much as you know you are right, you have to respect what the other is saying, everyone has it's own point of view and it's completely valid, not everyone is going to think the same way as you do, everyone is going to have some type of argument to win back.
It's okay to argue, it's completely normal, as I said, everyone has different points of view, but there's a difference between arguing, knowing the facts and just plain attacking someone else, that's when you hurt and it gets personal.
So the next time you are arguing with someone, think, Is it worthy? Am I right? Will this matter in a year? and if the answer to at least one of them is NO, take a step back, take a deep breath and be the big person, don't let the fight get to a point of no return, walk away if necessary and talk about it when you've cool down, you'll find an answer quicker and easier.
Fighting is never a good thing.

What inspires me to be better person every day? what inspires me to give my best? What inspires me to challenge myself? What inspires me to help others? What inspires me to set goals? What inspires me to get out of bed everyday?

Those questions round my head as I realise that maybe I'm not the same party girl that I was 4 years ago, and I'm definitely not the same girl I was two years ago when I started college, I was a completely different person and I'm happy that I changed.
My interest in those years changed and with that also what inspired me, maybe 4 years ago I was inspired by older people and the way they lived their life, going from party to party, not making any commitment, maybe two years ago I was inspired by the people that were able to go outside without fear, those persons that seem to had total control of their lives.
The answer to any of those questions is unknown, I feel inspired by different things, from the mother that fights for their children, to the dad that's picking up their children from school, to the grandpa that still goes out to do what they want to do.
I don't have a person to look up to, I think that's almost selfish, there are so many people out there fighting, doing their best, going out to have the best, and they all deserve recognition and admiration, because their are doing what they can to be the best version of themselves, some of them are not only fighting for themselves, they are also fighting for others.
A clear example for me is one of my cousins, he's a single dad, he has a tough history, he doesn't talk about it very often, he's really reserved about the whole thing and that's also another thing I admire from him.
He had to fight for his son, he never took away at the sight of problem, he's been there in the goods and  the bads, he lived in motels, he lived out of his savings, he even went to jail (for a mistake) all because of his son, because he loves that boy so much that he was not going to be leaving him in a house where no one took care of him, that's what inspires me.
And even when he has gone through all of that, he still finds a reason to smile and laugh every single day, he's the first one to crack a joke about anything, he goes to work every day or every night, depends on what others tell him and even tired and sleepy, he takes his son to his swim practice.
That's the kind of thing that inspires me, because if he can fight, so do I, I don't have any of those problems, I'm healthy, I have an economic stability, food, a roof over my head and a lovely family, that alone makes me the luckiest girl.
So, there are many things that inspire me, many people that I see on my day to day that inspire me, family members that are life examples for me, that's the reason I get up from bed every day, that's what I give my best, that's why I challenge myself, that's what inspires me.

Tomorrow starts, tomorrow I lose all of my free time and begin working full time, it's going to be hard, but one thing this week has showed me is that no matter how hard it is, how much I work, I love this job, I love everything about it, even if I have to wake up at 6 a.m.
This week has been no bed of roses, from Monday 'till Friday I had to sit and work, I only had one kind of free day on Wednesday and by that day I was already feeling weak and without energy, but I still managed to do a lot of things that needed to get done, I felt proud with myself for that.
Monday was supposed to be a low day, we had a lot planned for the week, except Monday, so I decided to make it a chill day, but oh boy, my life never goes to planned, I actually got a call from work, the old one, and as much as I wanted to say "I can't go", I went and had a productiv afternoon.
Tuesday, back to my new job, it was a normal day, I actually had the opportunity to talk and feel crappy about myself, I had lady problems and the only thing I wanted was to lay in bed and eat chocolate, but I managed to work my way through the day and come out clean.
Wednesday was a day off, kind off, I used this day to take my laundry out, clean and most importantly, buy groceries, while doing that, I discovered that I had no will-power, I ended up buying chocolates and gummy bears because they reminded me of "Stranger" and this week I was missing him, but I managed to save the chocolates for a "Well done" treat for the week.
Thursday, another day of work, it was nice to sit and talk while working, I'm starting to get along with my co-workers and I feel like this job is right for me, everything about it makes me love it even more, the down side? I started to get sick, there's a virus going in that office and as I haven't been eating really well, I was feeling crappy.
Friday,  everyone loves a good friday, but I had to go to work, which didn't bothered me as much as others may think, I seriously love that job (Quote me on that in two weeks), I had a stressful morning, I wasn't feeling that well, I was really cold and working on a hill, the temperature tends to drop, but when I had a load of phone calls and people waiting for me, I wanted to freak out, but I didn't I managed through the whole thing and I feel proud about myself.
It was a definetely interesting week, it had a lot of things in it, a lot of work, a lot of sleepy eyes but also a lot of laughs and honest smiles, which only pumps me up, I have a lot of projects and this work, I feel motivated to take whatever is to come and I feel happy.
Now, I'm going straight to bed, I want to sleep as much as possible, because next week is going to be my dead, but a good one. Have a great week and remember to keep on dreaming.

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There's something magical about music, the way it can help change your mood, the way it relaxes us, there are some people, like me, that can't live without music, nothing against silence, but music helps me get things done and relax, all in one, I almost feel like I over think without music.
We all have those days were you just have a lot going on and you just want to stop, but you can't, because there's still a lot to do, this are my favourite songs for those moments, hope you enjoy.

A few months back I went to Chef's culinary contest, before this I was completely on the loop of whether she was actually learning something at college or not, we would talk about it, but as we are in really different parts of the spectrum, if would stay in a "Good job, keep going" type of thing.
When she invited me, I couldn't say no, there's such thing as supporting your friends no matter how bad they do, this was one of those occasions, but I had a bit of a problem, I had a meeting at the same time and there was no way of cancelling at 20:00 the night before the event, so I parted myself in two and did the unimaginable, and even though I was late, I still managed to see how amazing she did.







She won the second place, so I took her to eat to cheer her up. It's worth saying that this was a rough day, but it was so worthy and so incredible, she gave th best she could and even when I think she deserved the first place, I'm happy that she got the second one, because it pumped her to keep going and keep participating. I'm a proud friend and I'll support her every time I have the chance.

Dreaming big became really important in my life after going through depression, you don't realise how important is to set goals and dream big to be able to get somewhere, it's part of your daily motivation, it's part of the thing that keeps you going.
Every time you work out, every time you go out looking for something, every time you feel like you are going to be defeated, every time you are going to give up, think about that dream, that goal, that thing you are working towards, the work is all part of that.
The other day someone asked me what I do to keep those dreams in my head and to keep me motivated, there no recipe or magic to this, it's about the mindset, but there are somethings that may help you.
Look for inspiration, you need to start somewhere, find someone to look up to, find new interest, look for new things that you may be interested to try, make a list or an inspiration board, make sure you don't forget anything.
Try new things, you don't just find a passion, there are people out there, that were lucky enough to find their passions since their early years, but it isn't the same for everybody, some of us struggle to find what we want to do and even when you do find it, you want to try new things and it's okay.
Keep trying, you are not going to master anything overnight, failing is part of the process, don't let any of this defeat you, keep trying and if you don't think is working, return to step two and try other things.
Make a plan, it doesn't has to be perfect, it doesn't has to be strict, it may change with plan but having an idea of how to accomplish that dream, goal, get where you want really helps, take changes as you go, but remember to always keep your goal in mind.
work hard, because nothing you want is going to just happen, it takes a lot of hard work to get where we want to get, it's never going to be an easy road, there may be days were you are going to want to stop, don't give up, it's hard, but worthy.
Take breaks, not everything is work and even when it's easy to let ourselves get into this insane work routine, if you don't take a break, your body is going to notice and you won't be putting 100% into anything, so take a break from time to time and remember to enjoy life.
Do your thing, normal is too boring, don't let yourself do what everyone is doing, do what you think is best for you, we only get this one life and it's too short to do what others are doing, don't let yourself get into categories, create your own and go your way.
Do it because you want too, not because someone is telling you to do it, if you do it because you want, you are going to enjoy it a lot more, don't let anyone tell you what you should do, if you are okay being where you are, stay there, if you want to explore the endless possibilities, go on, no one can stop you.
And remember to not let anyone take your dreams away from you, they are yours and you're free to go after them.

I want to talk about many things, but I don't know where to start, so I'm just going to do the thing I know how to do best, make a list per day.
Sunday, I went to a meeting for my new job, it was a course about how to treat a kid when in an accident, it was actually really interesting, I never realised how many things I didn't knew until that day, it also helped me be more interested in the summer and the whole dynamic we are going to be implementing, I also had a huge fight with my mum, we didn't talk until Monday night, it took a turn on me.
Monday, I had a fight with my grandma and I was really sensible, I cried and felt like poop, but at one point, while I was crying, I told myself that I needed to pick myself up and do something that will make me happy, I worked out for about an hour, my heart was pounding, my breathing was irregular but I was calm after that, I was singing and being myself again, I also ran all the errands I could.
Tuesday was my first day at my new job, I got up really early, got ready and got there before anyone else, at first I was in the loop to whether I was going to like it, or at least be good enough for the job, but at the end of that day, I understood that I just have to try and do my best, because no one knows everything and it's important to remember that and to give your best and that's what I'm going to do.
Wednesday was an out of the house day, I had work from my old job and this one was my only free day, I ran around and did everything I could, I was exhausted by the end of the day, but I noticed that the previous nights were bad for me, I didn't slept well, I was waking up tired and really early, so I decided to have a killer workout and stretch, I did a bit of yoga at the end and no lie, I slept like a baby that night.
Thursday, I had to go to my new job again, this time with more sleep on me and also more relaxed, it was a good day, but I was still carrying my tiredness from the days before, so as soon as I got home, I was under my sheets resting and sleeping, I had a quick nap before working out and stretching again, I still feel like I could use a couple more hours of sleep, but I'm getting there.
Friday, I started quite early, my mum stood on the wrong feet and she hurt her knee, I took her, along with my dad, to get her some x-rays, she didn't broke anything but it was just to be sure about it, I got my iPad fixed, finally, the screen was broken and I needed it to be fine for work, I saw a really tired "Artiste" that gifted me a colouring book for my "stress issues" that I don't have and spent the afternoon with my mum, it was my day to do my thing.
One thing I discovered this week was how I like my coffee, there's this service lady in the office that asked me how I liked my coffee, I told her how I did it, she made it, it was the most amazing cup of coffee ever, I don't know what I'm going to do without her, I'll tell her to teach me (The coffee is decaf, I love the flavour but I don't like how it makes me feel when I'm anxious), I love her.
I don't think I have anything else to report on, I feel pretty good right now, still tired, but it's all part of it, I'm excited to start working with the kids and just being more active, have a great week and keep on dreaming.

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Books are a passion of mine, but it wasn't always like this, there was a time when reading seemed like the worst idea ever, I found it boring and I didn't understood what the fuss was about when they talked about the latest Harry Potter book.
I grew up in a reading environment, my parents love to read, they do it for work and for fun, we actually live in between magazines and books, they love it, they encouraged me to read, but other than the books I was asked to read in school, I never did it.
This was until high school, by this I knew how to cheat my way around book reports, I didn't read the whole thing, I would pick ideas and make my own from different online reviews, it was really bad, but really clever, no one found out about it, but when I met "Artiste", she was reading a book a week, for fun, this made me start to realise that maybe reading was fun. I started to read a book every six months maybe at this time, I didn't found enough interest in there.
When I entered college, I learned how to read fast, I wasn't going to spend 3 weeks with a short book, I had to go quick through books in order to be able to sleep at least 5 hours, then one trip, I decided to download Divergent, this book about the movie I went to watch with a friend the week before and loved.
It was a 5 hour trip, by the third hour, I was done, I read the book and was so anxious and impatient about knowing what would happen next, that as soon as we got to our destination, I downloaded the next two books and read them in the following two days, I cried a lot when it came to an end, but this were the books that opened a whole new world for me to explore.
From there I started to read more and more, I would read every book I could get hold of, I couldn't go to bed if I had two or three chapters left from a book, I needed to know what would happen next, I had a bunch of sleepless nights, but it was all worthy, I now know how to control it.
That's why I wanted to create a book club for so long, I knew I wanted to share what books I came to love and which ones didn't made the cut for me, it something I'm really passionate about and I hope you like it, I'll make sure to keep it as interesting as I can.
The review will go up the first and the third Saturday of the month for now, I'm going to go a little slow and work my way there, have good night reading.

Memories are a huge part of we are, they made us the ones that we are and they are really valuable, I like to have pictures that remind me of that moment in time, they help me remember who I was, what was I doing and a little of how I felt.
That's why I've been thinking of sharing my favourites pictures from past moments with you, I've been picking the ones I love the most to show them to you, I want it to be like those moments were you sit down with your mum and you go through old albums, it really melts my heart.
My photo memories go back to June 14, unfortunately, before that date, I don't have anything, between cellphones and computers I lost a lot of them, but I do promise to look through facebook to try and find something.
This time we are going way back to little Mayte and her last trip to go and visit their aunts. I used to stay with them for the duration of the summer until I was in high school, but I always go back when I need to escape, this time it was really needed and my parents supported me, so this pictures represent a rather sad me, trying to find closure with their relatives.







As I said, the photos are not the best, but they really represent that trip, I wondered, I walked, I enjoyed the view and I remember coming back from that trip and thinking how much I wanted to come out of that hole that I was digging. It was a good trip, hope you liked to re-live it with me.

I grew in a really social environment were not only I did I had to be surrounded by family but also other people, I was the last, at that time, from my generation and the only one to be a girl, I grew in an environment where people liked me, they cared and spoiled me every time I was around, I grew with this idea that everyone was going to like me.

I can finally talk about all of those things I've been keeping secret for a long time now, that has been pure hell for me, I can't keep a secret unless I really, really have to, which were the case of most of this thing.
First, I have a new job, yep, you read it right, I still have my old job with my mum, but for summer I wanted something to keep me out of my house for more days, this is my dream job, I will be working in a summer course as a head assistant, this combines two of my passions, kids and organizations, plus I'm going to have this amazing views from my office every day. I didn't say anything to anyone because I didn't wanted to jinxed it, the was a moment during June that I knew I was going to get it, but nothing was set in stone, so I wait and one day they called me and gave my uniform.
Second, there's a bun in the oven and it's not mine, "Artist" is pregnant, I can finally say this to the world, I've known for 2 months, I didn't react well, it took a long time to sink in, but it finally did and since then, I've been joking around about the name and things like that, she's beyond excited and hormonal.
Third, I'm finally launching a book club, it's been long time overdue, I wanted to do it but for something always kept me of doing it, but I finally said "F' it, I'm doing it", that's one of the reasons of why I've been reading so much lately. The name is going to be "Of the bookshelf" and it's going to go up the first and the last Saturdays of the month.
Fourth, I'm changing things up, for a long time I've been posting every Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday, it works wonders for me, it's amazing but I think it's time to do something different, I'll be having the same thing on Sundays, Mondays and Wednesday, but Fridays are going to be strictly to photo diaries, Saturdays are for Lifestyle things like food, music, books, style, you name it. I want to slowly add more and more of those things but keeping everything fresh and interesting, you now know enough about me, it's time for you to know more about what I love.
Fifth, I redid my social media, I always keep them quite alone and unused, I like to say that I don't have enough time, but that's a lie, I can definitely find a few minutes to use it and be more active, I started by making it more mine, adding things I love and such and now I feel more inspired to use them, maybe on a daily bases
Sixth, I redid my tumblr, I had to close my old one, I was having a lot of problems and the best thing for me was to just shut it down and start fresh, I'm keeping the design really simple for the pictures to stand out, it's going to be like an inspiration board.
Seventh, I've been doing slight changes to my routine, I work out on a daily bases, I eat healthier, I'm going to start a new job and all of those things call for changes, if I want to be sane, I'm going to have to be more organised, if I want to stay healthy, I'm going to have to keep working out, eating healthy and smile more. Those sometimes seem like really small things, but think about how much they are going to change your body and your humour.
One part that's becoming really important for me is to be more optimistic, not naive, I want to be more aware of my surroundings and see what I can do to make them better, I don't want to keep thinking on "What if...?" I want to go out and do it, if it turns out bad, at least I tried, if it turns out good, it's going to be amazing.
Have a good month, week and keep on dreaming.

We are halfway through the year, a part of me really wants for it to be Christmas, but the biggest part of me is scared, last month I finished my 6th semester, I'm almost done with my college, that terrifies me, I'm going to turn 21 and even when I've never been one of those people that freaks over age, I feel a little intimidated by the whole "Being an adult" thing, I'm also scared of missing my friends, we are all growing, becoming older, settling with a partner, doing this amazing things, but that also means that we don't get to spend as much time together.